Old Habits
by That Hopeless Romantic
Summary: Post E.C. Fic. Artemis is still memory wiped, but is doing good deeds for a reason he doesn't know. The People are once again faced with a problem thats threatens thier society and need Artemis for a mission. This is going to be a long HollyArtemis Fic.
1. Bad Habits

Disclaimer: All Artemis Fowl related characters are not mine. They belong to Eoin Colfer and his merry little band of dwarves.  
  
Detective James Barker was not having a good day. He was woken up at three this morning to solve a simple, open and shut, homicide. For Christ's sake! The perp was standing there, at the crime scene, murder weapon in hand and his prints all over the body! To make matters worse the coffee machine was broken and he had to resort instant. Topping it all off was this wackjob here that was brought in after a civil disturbance report, apparently the old lady across the road from this guys' house heard some gun fire and called the cops, so here he was.  
  
Pinching the bridge of his nose Barker tried hard to make sense of this man's nonsense.  
  
"So your telling me that a 14-16 year old boy, in a suit, broke into your house, and demanded that you return the money you stole from the Save The Earth foundation?" he asked  
  
"n-... no, it was Butler that broke in, the kid just walked in afterwards! And he ain't any ordinary kid! He's Artemis Fowl for cryin' out loud! And I didn't steal any money!" replied the other man, in a small, pensive, voice.  
  
"So all of those cheques to Save The Earth foundation on your coffee table just appeared out of nowhere? And what about the gunshots?"  
  
"I got real scared, Fowl's Butler fella does that to you, and I pulled my gun an-"  
  
"You're miserable you know that?! You pulled a gun...on a kid!...!"  
  
"Look man...he's no wet behind the ears kid you know!"  
  
"That's no excuse! What about that 'shield' you talked about earlier?"  
  
"Listen! I meant exactly what I said earlier! He saw the gun...laughed...an' this bluish ball o' light appeared around him and his giant bodyguard...naturally I got a little spooked and my finger slipped on the trigger.."  
  
"I'm getting REAL tired of your damn theatrics! What else happened?"  
  
"The bloody bullet bounced straight off and nearly popped me one in tha head!"  
  
"Damn well should of! What happened AFTER you tried to murder a 14 year old kid?"  
  
"They both disappeared!"  
  
"Ohh....so they just disappeared..into thin air.you know that by making up stories won't help you plead insane" "I'm not trying to plead insane-"  
  
"Take him away officers, he just confessed to fraud and denies being insane"  
  
The other man spluttered and struggled against the two burly police officers that "escorted" him to a nice 2 by 4 cell. "You don't know what your dealing with" he screamed until they rounded a corner and were out of sight.  
  
Detective Barker just shook his head and walked to find Shane Holman, his assistant. When he reached his cubicle he saw that something was up, clearly seen by the amount of people clustered around his assistants' desk.  
  
"What's going on here" he growled, glaring at several people until they gave up and slinked back towards their respective work stations.  
  
"uh...not much sir, just looking up the name that the crazy guy kept telling us-"  
  
"Artemis Fowl?"  
  
"That's the one...he was right, he is only a kid, 16 in a week or so, but he has a quite impressive criminal record. No arrests but he has been a major suspect in every major crime involving multi-million dollar amounts in the last 6 years-"  
  
"You expect me to believe that some snot nosed kid his been fleecing people out of millions of dollars since the age of 10!"  
  
"Not me sir, Interpol, and he isn't any 'snot nosed' kid. He recently took an IQ test and scored 218"  
  
"And..?"  
  
"Sir...Einstein's IQ was 223"  
  
"oh..."  
  
"He has also released several hundred patents for numerous computer components that outstripped IBM Intel in power and expense...Intel then offered him 26 million for them and then managed to recoup their losses in those items by sales alone!"  
  
"Impressive..So why has did he bust some guy stealing money from a charity? Doesn't seem his style"  
  
"I can't tell you sir...I just don't know...but it seems like he's trying to help the world by stopping or crippling it's major enemies. He has been recently been suspected to have stolen a East Asian whaling company funds directly from their bank's database. He as also stared a energy company using new improved solar panels of his own design, and making a killing too"  
  
"looks like we have an environmental vigilante on our hands...what about that 'Butler' guy?"  
  
"him?. he's a nasty piece of work.6" 12' tall.110kg.. he's the boys' bodyguard, servant, cook...you name it he does it...he graduated top of his class from Madame Ko's protection course"  
  
"aww crap.. another one of those?" (a fellow class leaver of Madame Ko's academy recently took out a S.W.A.T. tactical response team after they tried take his principal, a Colombian drug lord, into custody. He was unarmed.)  
  
"'Fraid so"  
  
Detective Barker squinted at the screen, his brow creased with thought...  
  
"There's something strange going on here, and I'm going to find out what" he muttered while his assistant mentally groaned.  
  
"there isn't much wrong with Detective Barker" he thought "but he likes his detective clichés a little bit too much"  
  
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~  
  
THREE HOURS AGO  
  
Artemis Fowl stood outside the door on 128 Amaro drive, his burgundy Versache suit out of place in this shabby neighborhood. He looked to be coming out of the other side of puberty, no longer a boy but now a young man. His body was now more tone and fit than it used to since his frustration at feeling helpless during some of his previous criminal escapades made him take on a strict exercise routine, and as a extra benefit to the time he spent outside his skin had lost its pallid color and now was a becoming shade of light brown. His companion, Butler, a man who could be accurately be described using the phrase "as big as a house" stood out like a piece of raw meat at a vegetarian restaurant. Even though the man looked to be in peak condition something about his stance and position made an observer think of an elderly man.  
  
"This is the place Butler," said Artemis, his carefully enunciated words echoing flatly in the small alcove. "Do your thing" and stepped back to let his bodyguards large frame to stand in front of the door. With a strategic set of thumps, scrapes and whacks the lumbering manservant allowed the now freed door to fall backwards into the home before taking a protective position in front of his principal. When the dust cleared the single occupant of the house stood staring at what once was his front door. "What the HELL do you think your doing?" he shouted before his eyes could tell his brain that the shadow in the door was actually a person and that person could probably break him in half easier than he could open a can of beans. "I believe the question is Mr. Murphy, is what the, hell, do you think your doing?" spoke a soft voice from somewhere in the vicinity of the man currently blocking the sun on his porch. "What are you talking about?! Get out of my house before I decide to shoot you!" to prove his point he drew a pistol from his waistband pointed squarely and the young man standing in Butler's shadow, causing the body guard to step further in front of Artemis, who brushed him away with a calm hand on his arm. "Don't worry Butler, I know that men of his ... level ... rarely have the mettle to pull the trigger"  
  
"Bu- Butler?... I know you! You're that Artemis Fowl kid aren't you?! Well let me tell you this! No KID is going to get me!" and with those parting words pulled the trigger. With a flash of blue light the bullet ricocheted off an invisible barrier, narrowly missing Mr. Murphy's head, to finally shatter a vase in the kitchen.  
  
"Ugh...little men with their gun's, and yes, this...kid...is going to get you. I know what you've been doing...and I disapprove...you know I can easily destroy you...make sure that you can never work, anywhere, EVER again. So take my advice...repent...and hope that your sins may be forgiven" Artemis intoned, his hands clasped in parody of a minister, before chuckling to himself ~*~ "Again with the jokes" he thought, "what is happening to me? Must be hormones, or magic...damn...another joke...this really must stop" ~*~ A further three bullets into the shield, rebounded around the room, to end up imbedded in various objects, unfortunately none of those objects was the now distraught Mr. Murphy. Murphy was now staring wide eyed at the calm youth who was inspecting his nails.  
  
"Quite done Mr. Murphy?" Artemis inquired, a benign expression on his face.  
  
"wha-? wha?- wha?" was all he could manage.  
  
"What am I? I am merely a 15 yr old boy with interests in this humble little planet we call home, and I am requesting that you forgo your greed and give yourself to the authorities"  
  
The shocked man had only one weapon left in his arsenal, the spent pistol. It spiraled through the air towards the barrier, impacting with a blue flash and spinning off on a perfect tangent towards the face of an unlucky Mr. Murphy. It was poetry in motion. The sound of both the gun and the unconscious Murphy echoed in the empty house.  
  
"It's nice to know that my shield worked isn't it Butler?" Artemis remarked as they traveled back to the Manor "The idea for it came to me in a dream you know, strangely enough you were in it, but it could only stop lasers and sonic's, highly rare in today's munitions market, so I added a filter so the light went into the blue spectrum, creating a slower but stronger shiel- what's wrong Butler? You usually at least pretend to listen to what I say ~*~ why does that sound so familiar? ~*~ "  
  
"I thought the Artic Mission was the last time, Artemis" Butler replied, his steely eyes still on the road.  
  
"What are talking about? It was! All of it now is for a 'good' cause. For some reason. And plus, I couldn't just go to SCHOOL? heh... Butler?" Artemis replied with a chuckle.  
  
"You know what I'm talking about Artemis, in your top left pocket. You thought you could slip some of those cheques by me, I thought you knew me better. Your not doing it for anyone else but you"  
  
"It's true Butler, but old habits die hard...old habits die hard" Artemis muttered, staring at the scenery rushing past the window.  
  
Author's Notes: Well here's one for 1st's!! that is my first ever FanFic...ever. I need all of your Review's so I can see if it's worth continuing. Oh and if you see any letters missing was because I was up till 2 last night with a blood alcohol level that would make a grown man cry...and now it's 11:30 pm...and oh yeah! I was up at 6 am... I'm not a happy chap... if you see lots of full stop where the should be gaps is cause there supposed to be a set of three dots, but it ain't happening :( So if you wanna know the plot here goes...i dunno! So far this is after Eternity Code, so he's missing a fair chunk of his memory...more astute readers will pick up similarities which are residual memories...anyway if you see any GAPING HOLES is because I have no PRE-READER!!! I NEED A PRE-READER!!!!! READ AND REVIEW PEOPLE!! I NEED LOTS AND LOTS OF REVIEW SO I CAN REMND MYSELF THAT PEOPLE ACTUALYY WANNA READ WHAT I WRITE!!! Yeay! Please send any suggestions about a direction and how to introduce the People.oh yeah this is a A/H fic...there is nothing wrong with it! I personally know a 16yr old guy who is good "friends" with a 20ish woman. And also there is more plot to base it on. Thank you and good night. 


	2. Thoughts

Disclaimer: Artemis Fowl is owned by Eoin Colifer  but any new characters are mine...ALL mine MWHAHAHA. Sorry.

Authors Notes: Sorry bout the long wait but I've been traveling.. I dunno how many people I'm reaching with this but I hope you like it. As always Reviews would be great. I had a bunch on people Beta/Pre read for me and I'm REALLY thankful. These people are: Tonduil The Elf, animefanatic 0 7, and Kelaal. Thanks heaps, you may recognise bits and pieces of your suggestions in there 'cause I thought they were great. Anyone else who is desperate to get the next instalment of Old Habits before it gets posted just ask and you can pre-read...and if anyone wants to know the plot...just ask. Enjoy.

P.S. anyone know how to do italics...I dunno if it the ones on here will work but if they don't...help please?

The "beat" was boring as hell, nothing but disgruntled pedestrians. Whose sole purpose in life seemed to bother the hell out of you. Holly Short sighed as she listened to a (another?) complaint from an nauseatingly overweight gnome.

"Please fill out this complaint form and deliver it to LEP Police Plaza before moon-rise," she dutifully stated, pulling a hefty wad of paper from her belt pouch and holding it out where she 'thought' the gnomes' face was. Unfortunately, the gnome had turned around (how could she tell?) when she wasn't looking, and she ended up poking it in the back of the head.

Out came a steady string of curses and Holly sighed again, shutting out all outside influences and sinking deep into thought.

"Where did it all go wrong?" Holly wondered. "Adventures all the time, being above ground every other day, shooting at mudmen...and now THIS! Sometimes I wish that Artemis hadn't been mind wiped, just so I could keep having to hunting him down and have something to do"

"Not just for that either," whispered another part of her, almost missed in the cacophony of her thoughts, but she managed to catch it, and her eyes widened in surprise. She finally managed to wrench her mind from her reverie and turn her attention back to the street.

 Thankfully, the gnome had gotten tired of trying to speak to her and waddled off somewhere. Her feet had brought her to the front of Police Plaza, a few meters in front of the new statue. It had been erected shortly after the public had found out that Artemis had been mind wiped and out of their lives forever. It was of an cowering Artemis surrounded by a team of flying LEP retrieval officers...all of them male obviously. Holly laughed the first time she saw it; as it was so unlike Artemis, it was funny. Anyone who had met Artemis knew that it was impossible for him to cower. It wasn't in his make up. Those glacier blue eyes were incapable of fear, except for when a friend was in danger... Butler, Juliet.…...herself. That was hard to admit, that a mudBOY was a friend...an equal...worthy of respect. The respect part admitted freely; Artemis was the only person to successfully part the People from their gold, so respect was almost DEMANDED...particularly so that he was never underestimated.

Holly willed her feet into motion. "It isn't like I've had NO adventures since Artemis had been 'wiped'. There was the Troll Migration for one...that was...interesting...but it wasn't the same without Artemis; she missed his snide comments in her ear when Root or Foaly tried to chew her out for one reason or another. Walking into LEP headquarters, she spied Foalys' Ops Booth. She spent many afternoons watching the  "Artemis" Surveillance tapes. It was good to see that he hadn't reverted completely when he lost his memory. His little Eco Crusade was almost as interesting as watching prime time. She barely managed to stop herself from laughing when Root literally exploded after he seeing Artemis' little 'shield', scrambling a Retrieval team before realizing that it was only a partial memory. Foaly copped it really bad when it came out that a 16 yr old boy had topped his SafetyNet (c) with only a minor adjustment. . Holly did burst out laughing when she'd found out about that.

Holly was halfway towards her cubicle when she started noticing something was...off. firstly, an elf was hurtling through the building on a set of wings...backwards...screaming until he hit a wall with a audible crunch. Holly gave a little wince before moving on; after all, stranger things have happened. The next niggling was a bit more obvious. The lights in the building were...singing. She didn't really know how, (although later she had it explained to her by Foaly who used words so long that if one of the letters was a centimeter tall, they would be taller than her) but she was definite that they were. With a quick look around, she saw that others were hearing it too. The song shifted every few seconds but finally stopped on a popular song sung by the Toadstool Three. Holly took a few tentative steps towards her cubicle. By now, the lights had begun changing colour, and swivel chairs were becoming dangerous indeed. She gave up and walked towards the commanders office, meeting him coming out of it.

"Captain Short...just the person I wanted to see...come in, but watch the fan," Root said gruffly; his face quickly becoming a dark shade of crimson. In there already was Foaly, his large horse body pressed firmly to the ground, out of the reach of fan that looked like it was about to break the sound barrier. 

 "Artemis?" Holly asked, a familiar but unidentified warm feeling already spreading through her, leaving her knees weak.

~+~ _"I really should speak to a doctor..." _she thought _'This is happening more and more_" ~+~ 

"Close. Pony, fill her in with the details...quickly though; we don't have time for a lecture[.]" Root yelled over the roar of the fan, which was now spinning so fast that Foaly secretly feared that it would implode and become a miniature black hole.

"Here's the deal," Foaly started, "We've got what you ~could~ call a computer virus," said "The reason it has infected every thing was it was the councils smart little idea to let a liiiittlle megalomaniac called Opal Koboi to run all of Haven from one mainfram-" 

"Opal's behind this?" Holly interrupted. "And did you say ALL of Haven is affected?"

"Well no, for the first part, the little b-...witch is safely behind bars at a nice little jail somewhere,and as for the second part...you should just see for yourself." Foaly said, leaning over and pulling back a curtain. Outside, chaos reined. Holly saw pixies and elves being dragged along by rouge sets of wings. She could also see the lights at a intersection randomly changing every few moments, causing major traffic problems. Her view was suddenly cut off as the curtain was forcibly drawn close by an angry Commander Root.

"For Frond's sake, shouldn't you be moving on, Foaly?" he growled through clenched teeth.

Foaly picked up on the Commander's mood and quickly continued the briefing.

"Well um… yes...it seems...ahh another Mudperson is behind this recent threat...but it seems that the culprit is actually unaware that his little virus is causing havoc...because you see on the surface it is a clever little program tha-" 

"How did it reach our system? And if it's a program that a mudman has written for something else, how come it's effecting us so differently?" Holly asked, watching as Foaly suddenly went awkward, and Commander Root's facial hue was a now a nice purple color, which was bad news for anyone in the same room as him.

"Well, DONKEY boy over here rigged up all of Haven to a hard-line on the surface just so he could watch some SHOW!" Root yelled,]\ his now purple face darkening to an evil shade of vermilion. Holly wondered it was possible to bleed through the skin. Foaly managed to somehow stand under Root's verbal assault and reply with a defiant expression and stammer out "Buffy is a great sho-" before Roots' glare threatened to sight him alight, already his fur was smoking.  

"WHATever," Root muttered. "All that matters is that the pony over there got us into this mess and, as always, thought of a plan to save our skin...namely his."

"Ahh...yes...the reason the virus is affecting us this way is because the Haven OS (operating system) is programmed in Opal's own code, which only some mudmen system code corresponds with, and the remaining information led to what you can see outside..." Foaly explained.

"So why can't we fix it? Just reprogram the OS?" Holly asked, her mind already focused on the task ahead.

"Therein lies the problem…The virus updates itself constantly, and if we just cut the connection, the virus will update itself, using the processing capablilites of the computer it is currently in...and if it gets ahold of the HavenOS mainframe...there is no telling what will happen...and we just can't risk it. What we have to do is detonate a datacharge here, and at the source, simultaneously, to stop it...that's where you come in" Foaly continued.

"How are we going to get permission to enter the premises of the suspect?" asked Holly.

"The suspect is a one Justin Phelps, millionaire telecommunications entrepreneur, who is using the program to slowly leech funds from major banks," Root interjected. "W]\e managed to track down the location of the main computer before my computer started playing Pong against itself. It is located at his home on the east coast of England." 

"So?" Holly asked, incredulously "We still need to get permission to enter his property!"

Root just stood there, smiled, and reached into his pocket for his ever-present cigar.

"This is the good part. He is hosting a youth Mensa Competion and we thought that we coul-" He was suddenly cut off by Holly.

"Artemis...," she said, breathlessly

"Correct...we bring our favorite little Mudboy back to speed, play a bit of the guilt game, maybe slap on some mesmer, and use him to get permission into this gathering of underage Nobel candidates. I'm sure he's up to it."

Holly just stood there nodding. She already knew that she was never going to use the mesmer on Artemis. All she could think of were those ice blue eyes. ~+~ "_Artemis_…" she thought "_I'm going to see Artemis again...and not only that I get to bring him back to his 'real' life...__bring him back to me_"~+~ Her last thought was barely registered among the mass of plans and stratagem. At first, she thought she missed Artemis because of the adventures and fun they had, and she wanted him back so those times could continue...but now...this...little _voice_...she kept hearing confused her, and now she didn't know what to think. On one hand he was the biggest threat to fairy-kind for hundreds of years and a Mudboy to boot, On the other hand he had saved her life on several locations and made her laugh on many more...something she had seldom done since he left.  She barely paid attention for the rest of the meeting and stumbled home, her mind in turmoil, unconsciously dodging demented appliances, and collapsed into bed. She tried to organize her thoughts but gave up and pushed them into a dark crevice in her mind to figured out later and fell into a deep sleep.  


End file.
